Portobello Film Festival
presents the 1st London Film Makers Convention featuring
over 60 brand new independent films and their makers.
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8
DEC 2006. FRIDAY
Westbourne Studios, 242 Acklam Rd, W10
Comedy
6:00pm
Me, My Swami And I Graham Higgins 10 minutes 12A
India is the land of miracles. But the greatest miracle
is about to take place ... in East London. Anita Singh
meets a Guru at the supermarket. She is amazed when
he levitates in front of her. But is he really a Fakir
or just a fake. Comedy
The Time Travellers of 1908
Martin Pickles 10 minutes 12A Comedy
The Pitch Michael Alexander Dobbin 10 minutes 15 Comedy
Bernard & Beryl Ben Hilton 13 minutes U
When Beryl starts dancing with another man, can Bernard
brush up on his dancing skills to win her back? Comedy
Out Of Time Blake & Dylan Ritson 13 minutes 12
Charlie1s in trouble it1s the day of the presentation
and he1s woken up to discover there is something horribly
wrong with him. We follow his scramble to find a cure,
get to the meeting and patch up things with his girlfriend
all the while trying to hide his bizarre affliction.
Comedy
Get Your Tags Out Ben Hilton 3 minutes 12
Spoof trailer asking what if woman treated shopping
like men treat football? Comedy
11 Take Pedro Teodoro 1 minute U
The reality of filmmaking. Comedy
7:00
Skanked A Black Eye Filmz Production 30 minutes 15
Introduced by Bobby Joseph and Joe Crackass
The short film/sketch show based on the controversial
characters from the cult classics Skank Magazine and
Black Eye comic. See Pastor Weed show his love for the
almighty ganja on the streets of Ladbroke Grove! See
Scotland Yardie dish out his own brand of 'rude boy'
policing and watch Mary Mampy show off her panties to
complete strangers. Then there's the Urban Minstrels....
7:30
What the Fuck is Parkour? Jon Riche 14 minutes 15
If you don1t know what Parkour is, where have you been?
Are you some sort of hermit? Watch this film and see
Nimrod tear up the street using his hands and feet.
He was a Good Man and a Quiet Neighbour
Jon Riche 5 minutes 15
Riche and actor Spencer Jones met up coincidently after
they had both gone through extremely painful break-ups.
This film was their therapy.
Affairs Of The House Oli Maitland Hudson 13 minutes
15
A young conservative MP is thrust into the murky world
of politics. He is haunted by distorted visions of Margaret
Thatcher. Will he survive in this cut throat world?
Comedy
Cheer Up London Matt Freedman & Shyla Hassan 7 minutes
U
London maverick Noel Parris sets up his one man campaign
called ŒThe Society For Cheering Up Miserable Londoners!
He takes the campaign to Westminster with a cheap placard
and then to Oxford Street, but will people warm to his
one man cheer up push. Comedy
Technoprobe Punchdrunk 15 minutes 18
Controversial investigative reporter, Michael Muffins,
investigates the shadowy world of the technoprobe. Comedy
Dear Steven Spielberg Stefan Georgiou 20 minutes 12
Paul Buring has been writing letters and sending scripts
to Steven Spielberg for just under a year without reply.
Now, due to his persistence he becomes embroiled in
a conspiracy involving Spielberg, his lawyers and Hollywood
that's been milking audiences for 30 years.
9:00
Masterclass in film-making on a low budget
with Donald Takeshita-Guy
Bikini Blitzkrieg Part 1 Dance Domination
Donald Takeshita-Guy 75 minutes 15 Comedy
Battling Bikini Babes, March Mad Nazis, Cute Teenage
Terrorists, Singing Zombies, Virtual Reality Girlfriends,
Serial Killing DJs, Love Sick Robots, Gun Crazy Preachers,
Sadistic Mutants, Prepubescent Police Girls, Sex Mad
Gorillas, Kick Ass Ballet Dancers, Pogo Dancing Ghosts,
Elvis Presley All this and the end of the Universe we
all know and love from the Mad Mad Mind of Cult film
director.
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